About 4 weeks ago—when the shreiking from the GOPs was at its highest point over the stimulus—I was convinced the Democrats were in real trouble. The O-team had lost the reins of messaging, I said, and had surrendered to the minority party barely three months after the election that swept them to power. We were cutting family planning, the news networks were repeating those tired Republican “small government, no spending” messages, and we were stumbling all over ourselves to reach some sort of bi-partisan rapture over the stimulus package.  Couple that headache with the embarassing tax-related gaffes of a few (it felt like a hundred) O-appointees and you had one bleak beginning O-admin.

Or so it seemed.

Boy, was I over-reacting.  O-approval ratings stayed high in the 60s throughout the stimulus drama, Republican approvals have dropped to the lowest points ever, three Republicans voted in favor of the stimulus bill, and then intra-party fighting ensued over who is the prettiest Republican in the party.

The net result of the last few weeks is this:  The Republicans really are a dead party.  For now.  They don’t have it together and they are struggling to find their way, much in the same way Democrats were after the 2004 elections.  Great.  Could it get any clearer that the Republicans don’t have their shit together?

Yes.  Indeed it can. They can’t even spin the mortifying NYT headline that Obama is willing to talk to the Taliban (brilliant policy, but p.r. fiasco) to their advantage.

Check it: Last weekend Obama pushed a not-so-new idea that the US should outreach to the more moderate elements of the Taliban in an effort to advance our front in Afghanistan.  Nice idea.  Smart idea, even…let’s turn Taliban against itself.  It began working in Iraq (Republicans will credit solely the insurgency, of course) when the Sunnis started turning against al-Qaeda.  It worked there, Obama posits, and it can work in Afghanistan.  This new Afghan policy has historically been met with some skepticism and now Obama’s push for it is met with “some raised eyebrows”.  Truth be told:  mai tais and snorting cocaine off young, nubile male models is way more my thing than deconstructing our middle east foreign policy.  But remember the “We Don’t Negotiate with Terrorists” mantra the Republican chanted over and over in years past?  Where is it now?   Raised eyebrows?  Where is the blowback?  Isn’t this precisely what Republicans (and Hillary) warned us about on the campaign trail?

Are the Republicans really this disorganized, this unenthusiastic about their own party that they can’t even hit Democrats where they are supposed to the softest: The war on terrorism?

A Democratic President named Barack Obama is going to talk to the Taliban? This, by the way, is the exact opposite of the “Nixon in China” phenomenon  which holds that only a hawk can  sell the public on negotiations with commie symps. This is a black, Socialist, Harvard-educated liberal named Barack. Obama. And the GOP can’t get traction on that? They are dead.

No big surprise, but the Republican Party is in trouble.  Chaos, I say!  Their Conservative PAC 2009 Monster Truck Weekend fell flat (loads of empty seats and so much for that diversity facial they tried to give themselves). The biggest news coming out of it was that RNC Chair Michael Steele and conservative pillpopper Rush Limbaugh had a little spat over who’s prettier or something.   Whoopie.   Rep. Yawn and Gov. Snooze also spoke too, I guess.

As a result of the spat and subsequent Michael Steele apology, liberal blogs and O-Chief of Staff, Rahm Emanuel, have been all a flutter that Rush Limbaugh is the de facto leader of the Republican party.  Chalk one up for the “No Shit, Sherlock” column.

‘So what’ you say?  Why would the media even spend a moment thinking about this when the Dow is gasping for air, the economy is shedding jobs so quickly and The Bachelor has rejected his first choice?  Good question.

Here’s my take:  It defies logic that the Republicans are in such disarray and that little morsel is fascinating.  Right now, Obama has put forth huge spending and is pushing an arguably very left agenda.  His inability to get any House Republicans signed onto the stimulus bill was a blip on the radar and should have been a major embarrassment (not delivering on a major campaign promise of ending those partisan games of the past).

But it turns out that it wasn’t an embarrassment.  It’s not even denting his approval.  What should have turned into a major rallying cry for the Republicans basically turned into just a bunch of red hot air.  And public opinion of the Republican Party is at its lowest point ever while Obama’s is at his highest.

So my suggestion to the Democratic Party: Glob onto the coattails and help Obama spend his political capital.  He spent a crapload in the first 6 weeks of office and his approval is still in the 60s.  Do it before the Republicans get their shit together and come up with their 2010 version of Contract with America.

Yes, I’m still paranoid. I’m a Democrat.

“Ladies and Gentlemen:  Gary Locke as your new Commerce Secretary…”

(Crickets chirping.  Someone clears their throat.  Eventual polite golf clapping.)

This is the response of many in Washington state to the news that former Governor Gary Locke may well be on his way to Washington DC as our new Commerce Secretary in the Obama Administration.  Why the bland reaction?

Frankly, maybe it’s because it’s neither earth-shattering nor stunning news.  I am not stunned.  I mean, when I have a bad breakup with one of my coke-head supermodel boyfriends, I usually end up dating an accountant until I get bored again and need the high-stakes drama of a co-dependent, self-loathing supermodel again.  When J Lo broke up with the tumultuous P. Diddy, she didn’t date another P. Diddy next, she dated safe Ben Affleck.  Same logic applies here.  Obama was burned twice before, now he wants someone safe.  The pendulum hath swung to the other side.

Ok am I saying Bill Richardson or Judd Gregg are coke-head supermodels or that Gary Locke is Ben Affleck?  No, but I am on deadline, so go with the analogy.

The Commerce Secretary is not such a huge position in the O-admin (can you name one Commerce Secretary of note?)—so you don’t need someone sexy there. You just need someone to carry out the census and, um, actually count people.  I guess you have some jurisdiction over oceans, trademarks and shit.  Yawn job description yields yawn applicants.

Gary Locke is a solid, safe choice. He is a good bureaucrat (and that’s not a slam – having someone good at government is a good thing post-Katrina) and he makes safe political decisions (Hi, Priorities of Government!).

Overall, I like him. He vetoed the Defense of Marriage Act during the Republican-controlled Legislature in the late 1990s, so he’s good peeps.  He just doesn’t generate the kind of buzz and excitement you’d get with, say, a Jay Inslee appointment there, non sequitor as that would be. Maybe it’s that Gary’s an ex-Governor who’s off the political radar? That’s ok.

Now choosing Mona to head up Commerce would give that place some va-va-voom.

There has been talk lately that the stimulus package has re-energized the right wing.  Some think the O-camp’s blunders and gaffes on the spending parts of the stimulus have mobilized the conservative base in a faster, more unified way than the 1994 health care reform plan did. I just don’t see it.

True, we saw a fairly unified Republican House and Senate vote as a bloc against the stimulus, despite bi-partisan overtures from the O-camp and to the surprise of some of us who were still o-gasming from the inauguration.  True, we again see Ann Coulter rising from the ash(tray) like the phoenix she is, despite her wingnutiness. And very true that certain Republicans are threatening to deny their states stimulus funds, despite the desperation their own state budgets face.  Shouldn’t this be exactly the rallying cry a bruised, demoralized, post-08 Republican party needs to carry them through a 2010 midterm sweep?

As a gay, my motto is: “there’s always a but”.  BUT, the evidence proves they are screaming into the wind.  I mean, if you believe Gallup, public support for the stimulus went up between Janaury 25 and February 11 when the Republican screaming was loudest —7 points in fact—from 52% to 59%.  The anti-stimulus protest on Feb 16th at Westlake Center (um, a little late guys) was pathetic.  Check it: What, 50 people in attendance at Westlake holding lame signs? (Chris K reports on it here and is far more generous than I by giving their attendance a turnout at 100.)

Pity them. They know not what they do.

And check this: Congress’ approval rating went up 12 points to its highest points in 2 years. That’s the Democratically-controlled, near-supermajority Congress, bitches.

Obama is on a roll.  This week, his O-team announced a $75 billion plan to help 9 million homeowners stay in their homes. Specifically, the plan will entice mortgage companies to modify existing mortgages from folks about to default on their loans as well as propose changes to existing bankruptcy laws (finally!). Helping 9 million families stay in their homes is powerful stuff.  Couple this plan with the now passed O-stimulus plan which will create 3 million jobs. Hotness.

If these plans work, the Republicans will be O-fucked for a very long time. No amount of socialism baiting or cool, hip lingo will fix the downward spiral of the GOPs.

If they don’t work… well, I’ll be eating humble pie and we’re all O-fucked.

Hello faithful readers. My apologies for the delay in bringing you the mind-blowing, heart-pounding, euphoric O-news you crave.  I had to fly to Milan for a photo shoot with a bunch of other supermodels, so it took me out of the news for a few days.  God, I am so hungry.  All they feed us are breath mints and cucumber water.

Chris K. has been doing outstanding coverage on the stimulus anyway, so I know you’ve been in good hands. (And watch for his video report from DC later today!)

I am back now and what a difference a week makes.  Seems like that embarrassing Week 2-slash-Week 3 is just a distant memory.  How fickle we (I) are (am).

O starts week 3-slash-4 off with bang.

It started with Town Halls Monday.  You saw the news and read the headlines so no need to regurgitate here. It was pretty major. And now we have a new ‘Joe the Plumber’. Except she’s homeless and actually not a fake.  And her story is so moving that a Republican gives her an apartment rent-free (sidebar: we are sooo post-race in this country that white Republicans are falling all over themselves to give black single moms free rent! Yeah Obama! Take that welfare reform!).  My first instinct normally would be to think something suspect of said Republican, but it seemed really sincere.

Blah to touchy feelings!  This ain’t no Oprah. On to Tuesday!  Tuesday morning marked the President’s first and arguably the best press conference ever.  Check it:  Obama actually answers questions. Bill Clinton was a good media manipulator but never as direct.  And, out of nearly an hour press conference, O speechifies for only eight minutes and takes questions for nearly 51 minutes. What?!  51 minutes of answering questions?  And you call the reporters by name?  Holy shit.  Mind Explosion.

We also see the stimulus pass (thanks Maine!) later Tuesday afternoon despite some really gnarly press the previous week. Thank god. I thought for sure this thing was doomed.  I was, ahem, wrong. Mind Explosion Number 2!  Hopefully Specter, Snowe and Collins switch parties because they are O-fucked within their party.  Although, nothing is more satisfying than watching the Republican party eat each other up – just like we Democrats did to ourselves in 2000 and again in 2004.  Turnabout is Mind Explosion Number 3.

Then we have a couple of days of keeping the pressure on Congress to reconcile the two plans and some great White House barbs to the naysayers.  My fave from David Axelrod: ”The last thing that I think we are looking for at this juncture is advice on fiscal integrity or ethics from Karl Rove — anyone who’s read the newspapers for the last eight years would laugh at that.” Rove got served, muthafucka.

Then, to round out a great week…Sen Judd Gregg withdraws from Commerce Secretary.  Good riddance!  Here are the 4 reasons why I think Gregg called it quits:

1. He got roasted for avoiding a vote on the stimulus. Being a moderate from a swinging-blue state, I am sure he was personally conflicted about this vote far more than his stated reason of being professionally conflicted.

2. The Census is under the jurisdiction of the Commerce Secretary.  Yeah, really.  Gregg hates the Census and like most whacked Repubs, he thinks homeless people and minorities (like those that show up to town halls and earn sympathy from nice Republicans) shouldn’t be completely counted in the census.  Obama thinks they should count and yanked the census from Commerce Secretary’s jurisdiction.  Could Obama’s balls get any bigger?  Nay, I say!

3.Pressure to keep the seat in Republican hands.  The person teed up to take Gregg’s seat upon confirmation, Gregg’s own chief of staff, agreed to be a placeholder and not seek election.  With current Democratic Congressman Paul Hodes filed to take the seat, a Dem win was almost assured.  Although Gregg said he doesn’t plan to run for re-election, having an extra year for Republicans to run someone or for Gregg to rebuild his battered image (like a no vote on the stimulus maybe?) increases the likelihood of the seat staying in Republican hands.  The R’s are banking that 2010 is a long time away and a backlash to the stimulus will cause the midterms to go their way.

4. He’s a dipshit. And dipshits do shit like this.  Don’t dissect it.  Just accept it as part of their nature.

Cheney, call me for hunting season

Shoot me in the face, please.  Seriously, take the most powerful shotgun available to man and blow an enormous hole in my head because: Charles Krauthammer and I agree.  

Let me spare you the depressing and all-too-true read. This is the gist:  The Obama honeymoon is over because Obama got sloppy.  Yes.  I have been saying this since my DC hangover wore off.  Daschle, Geithner, nominating lobbyists, the stimulus—all disasters and gaffes for this new Administration which prided itself on changing politics as we know it.

Krauthammer rightly notes that the stimulus is a fraud, packed with billions of dollars unrelated to real stimulus or job creation.  Now, I am not an economist and I don’t know if honeybee insurance (a break for beekeepers) helps stimulate the economy or not—I’ll leave that to fancy Harvard types and their graphs.  But I can tell you this: The complaint that honeybee insurance is wasteful is believable. Also in the “Um, no fucking thank you” column: Re-sodding the Capitol Mall and a tax break to Hollywood producers. 

Are the days of O-gasms and magical rainbow-shooting unicorns over?
Read the rest of this entry »

More of this

Donald Trump is your cheerleader.

The golden parachutes you will be deflating, well, not so much.

New headaches start from that CIA nominee of yours.

and your new puppies aren’t coming until fucking spring now.

I just want to put this week behind us. Sort of reminiscent of those nanny issues in the Clinton years, dontchathink?  And look how that turned out.

I feel that Obama has lost control.  He best get it back quick.  I would say the American people are angrier now than they were in 1994. And the Republican party has definitely rebounded faster than they did after the 1992 election.  You do the math.

Less of this

First order of business—correct course on the stimulus. What an unmitigated disaster.  I fail to understand how the Bush Administration can get Terri Schiavo legislation introduced, passed both chambers of Congress and signed into law by Bush less than 48 hours later.  With smaller majorities of Republicans in Congress, mind you.   And we are still fiddle fucking around with the stimulus with bigger majorities in both the House and Senate. It’s no fucking wonder people are pissed about Daschle.  I am pissed and I will follow the O-camp off the cliff.

How many more Obama nominees will have tax issues?  Fuck me times 3!  Geithner gets embarassed for his tax issues after a large dustup over his tax-related woes.  The NY Times called for Daschle to withdraw for his massive idiocy and he did.  And now an O-nominee for chief performance officer is withdrawing for her own set of tax problems. Didn’t we all hear that the O-camp was vigorously screening people’s tax records?  Who is doing this screening exactly?  Stevie Wonder?  Fuuuuck!

It’s Week 3 (I consider inauguration week, Week 1), and we’re already fucked.

The stimulus package that Democrats love will likely die in its current form. Yesterday, Republicans released the Wasteful Spending List of the Democrats’ stimulus package.  Fucking smart.  My prediction:  final nail in that coffin.  Look at that list. A $246 million tax break for Hollywood movie producers to buy motion picture film? $600 million to buy hybrid vehicles for federal employees? Are Democrats fucking high on their own O-crack?  Jesus.  When the House Republicans were grousing about family planning last week, I thought these would be philosophical debates over certain funded programs that Republicans don’t like.  No, Democrats have lost the reins of messaging.

Stevie Wonder, checking tax records of Obama nominees.

So Obama dropped 20 points in his opinion poll.  Ok, he was at an already over-inflated 84%. I get it…you don’t have anywhere to go but down.  But 20 points?  In only 14 days on the job?  I mean really…roll out Sasha and Malia for chrissakes.  More puppy talk.  More hope!  More O-koolaid, please.

And final depressing O-news of Week 3, Sen. Gregg, a Republican is appointed as Commerce Secretary.  Fine.  Biparisanship (it’s really really getting you somewhere) is a “good thing.”  But does the Democratic Governor replace Gregg with a Democrat?  No!  He replaced Gregg with a decent Republican…Gregg’s chief of staff.  Christ.  Can anything go right with my plan of Democratic dominance for the next 40 years a la the New Deal?

After a suprisingly sad display of partisanship by the House Republicans on Wednesday, Obama didn’t waste any time going back to the Fakey, Nice-Nice Bi-Partisanship Playbook.  This time, inviting the Senate Republicans over to watch the Superbowl on Sunday just before talks begin in the Senate on the $819 billion stimulus package.  I mean really. Are you going to hand out beer hats too?

Thank God Democratic organizations have their shit together and are running ads pressuring Republicans to vote for the stimulus package .  And as I brilliantly advised, Democratic groups are going after reasonable-ish Republicans (and note: reasonable Republicans are also mostly vulnerable Republicans during election time) to shame them into voting for the stimulus package.  Good for them.  I don’t know if these things really impact a Senator’s vote.  I mean Sen. Judd Gregg (R-NH) would never say “Oh yes, that SEIU ad really made me reconsider.”  But at the same time, putting public pressure on the Senator is never a bad idea especially if the ad is followed by a large public reaction.  Keep it up, please.  Maybe Obama will follow suit and play a little hardball of his own.

Or maybe I have been underestimating the Obama camp all along.  Take this little morsel:  The O-camp confirmed yesterday that Gregg is a candidate for Commerce Secretary.  Interesting.  I mean removing a GOP Senator from a Democratic-leaning state is pretty smart strategy.  And some evidence of a game of hardball. Here’s the vision: Obama says to Mitch McConnell, the Senate Minority Leader, “Hey, you deliver some votes on this stimulus package or I keep plucking your swing members out of the Senate and completely neuter your party”.  I mean, what would Senator Gregg rather do: Run an expensive campaign next year in a state that has HEAVILY trended Democratic in the last 2 election cycles or be Commerce Secretary.  Easy peasy.

This whole plan is predicated on the notion that current NH Governor, a Democrat, replace Gregg, a Republican, with a Democrat in the Senate.  Could be a tough sell for Governor Lynch, who is a moderate Dem at best. He also might feel more beholden to the independent “Live Free or Die” voters of his state, not to the O-administration. Does the fact his wife endorsed Hillary in the primaries while he remained neutral factor into this at all?  Probably not since Primary squabbles are soooooo 2008.  But who knows?  New Hampshire is fucking weird.

Okay, I’m gonna go a little deep here for a second and lay out the specifics of the possible Dem chess game. So, take a breath and bear with me: If the plan holds and Al Franken is sworn in as Minnesota’s new Senator (Jesus, what is taking so long?) and we get a Dem replacement in NH, we have our filibuster proof majority in the Senate.  Or do we even need a Dem replacement right away?  Maybe we just keep Gregg’s seat open long enough to vote on the stimulus.  Cloture (filibuster proofing) is invoked when 3/5 of the Senators duly chosen and sworn vote.  Hmm. If we have 99 Senators (assuming Franken gets sworn in or we get one Republican Senator), then we already have our filibuster proof majority at 59 Senators with Gregg as an open seat.

Oh, and looks like Senator Olympia Snowe is a yes vote in the stimulus package. Her seatmate, Susan Collins, not yet.  Looks like Maine TV will be getting extra ad buy purchases real soon.

Say “Praise Jesus”! Sing “Hallelujah”! The stimulus package passed the House. Um, Party Party line vote? So much for those bi-partisan Republicans. I am guessing Obama would like those hours of his life back that he spent bein’ nice and compromisin’. See where it gets you? Like I said yesterday: bipartisanship will only get you so far. Maybe George W. Bush was onto something. No compromising means more time at the ranch.

And let me just say that I hope this stimulus package not only works but makes them look like the petulant assclowns they are. I think Rep. Obey, chairman of House Appropriations, said it best today: “They don’t look like Herbert Hoover, I guess, but there are an awful lot of people in this chamber who think like Herbert Hoover”. A-fucking-men.

So what was this House version that passed? Guess what? An extra $3 billion for transit—that’s what!

The Wall Street Journal came up with a per capita map of the aid Washington should get if the bill passes in its current form. Drumroll. $1.3 billion. Wouldn’t that be nice. Here is how the goodies break down locally (meaning Washington state):

School and College Modernization: $316,341,000

Job Training: $56,799,208

Transportation Infrastructure: $847,078,890

I am guessing these numbers are adjusted since the stripping of family planning dollars and additional transit monies. But good to see that our own state budget shortfalls will get a little relief.

The bill now heads to the Senate. Someone confirm Senator Franken quick! We’ll likely need that vote.

The O-camp hopes this will be sent to the President’s desk by President’s Day.

I think the only thing that moved faster was Terry Shiavo legislation.

If I were advising the O-camp now (and they must have lost my cell phone because they haven’t asked me directly yet), I’d stop spending time with Mitch McConnell and focus like a goddamn laser beam on Olympia Snowe and Susan Collins. And throw in Voinovich, Gregg and Specter in for good measure. They tend to be reasonable-ish.

It seems that nearly every day comes some good O-news and some not-so-good O-news.  Take yesterday and today.

Good Green O-News:  Secretary Clinton appoints Climate Change envoy AND Obama pushes for tightening of emission standards.  Neat-o.  Hear that?  That’s the environmentalists’ version of rapture.  Todd Stern, former White House assistant and chief negotiator of the Kyoto protocol for the US during the Clinton years was named as the chief negotiator to the United Nations on all things climate change.  Two green thumbs up!

Great “Walk the Walk” O-News: Obama staff call Citigroup and ground their plans to buy a $50 million private jet with bailout bucks.  Boo!  Know where they are getting the jet from?   France!  Double boo!  Americans HATE greed and they double hate France.  Smart move, Team Obama.  Two Freedom Fries up!

Euphoric Muslim O-News: Obama starts his Muslim Listening and Comeback Tour.  With an interview on Al-Arabiya TV, Obama focuses on Iran’s naughtiness but emphasizes progress can come if we begin by listening first “because all too often the United States starts by dictating”.  Is it weird to be in love with my President?  This interview kicks off an 8-day listening tour by former Senator George Mitchell, special envoy to the Middle east.  Mitchell’s main job is ceasefire and Gaza, Gaza, Gaza.  Fix that, wouldya George? Two enthusiastic Korans up.

Now for the stuff that bums me out.

First Bad Cop-out O-News:  Yanking contraceptive and family planning support in the stimulus package. I agree that it’s a bit of a non-sequitor having it in there in the first place – other than the state budgets get a little breathing room in their general funds with it in.  I guess I am depressed because it feels like a complete reactionary move.  Republicans sqwak about wasteful government spending and the first thing that comes out is a coveted lefty ideal. I give that two ovaries down.

Second Bad Caving In O-News:  I am a partisan, so some of you won’t think this is bad news really.  Hear me out. Enough with the bi-partisanship. It’s ok to stick to your guns and not let Republicans have voice on everything.  Jesus. What’s the fricking point of having massive majorities if you are going to continue cowtowing to the Rs?  Specifically, I am referencing the fact that some of the O-economy team have said that the corporate tax breaks (to the tune of $23.8 billion) won’t do much to stimulate the economy.  They added that they were put in specifically to curry favor with certain lawmakers who need to say there are corporate tax breaks in the package (read: Republicans).  Two backbones down.

Weekend news:  Did you know that Rahm Emanuel cracks his knuckles and doesn’t care if Obama is irritated by it?  Fascinating and true.  Thanks, NYT!

Did you know some Republicans oppose the new O-stimulus plan?  Shocking.  Apparently, devoting 40 percent of the package to tax cuts isn’t enough.  And Senator John McCain is saying the stimulus package needs to make George Bush’s tax cuts permanent. Uh huh. How’d that pitch work for ya on the campaign trail?  Right. 

I would like Sen McConnell or Rep. Boehner to tell me exactly when any Bush stimulus package (Bush Tax Cut Version 1.0, Version 2.0 or Bank Giveaway Version 1.0) included 40 percent of new revenue for states or infrastructure (ie job creation and balanced state budgets) and left only 60 percent for tax cuts.  When did the Republicans EVER bring Democrats to the table (like Obama is doing with the Republicans) to talk about investments/revenue enhancements? I seems to recall those stimulus packages of yesteryear were pretty much 100% Republican-style tax cuts. Oh, or giveaways to banks.

And for the final piece of No Shit Sherlock News: Obama’s weekly address. More preparation for more bad news.  Steel yourself for the times, they are a worsenin’.  The Stock Market should open wonderfully on Monday.

In any event, since the O-news this weekend isn’t really news, I thought I’d talk about something equally mundane (or … not?) White House websites over the years!

As I was looking at the new White House website (and you simply must go…government is all the rage right now!), I couldn’t help but wonder:  What were the sites like once upon a time?  Were they visually appealing?  Were they easy to navigate?  Did they have useful information?  How interactive were they?  Enter archive.org.

Here are the links of the White House website for every year since 1996.  My, we’ve come a long, baby.(Note: some of the images don’t always show up, but you get the gist)

1996 1997 1998 1999 2000 2001 2002

2003 2004 2005 2006 2007 2008 has their css files stripped so you cant get the sense of the site layouts.

2009 (today)

Two interesting points:  First, the White House site during the Clinton/Gore years looks extremely remedial – even though it was the height of the .com rage.  And didn’t they create the internets and the tubes? And for those of you who will be quick to say: “technology wasn’t as advanced as it is right now”. I know that. I wasn’t raised in a cave.  Here’s Amazon’s website in 1998 and tell me if the White House couldn’t have punched it up a bit. And Amazon didn’t turn a profit until 2002.

Second and more interesting, like George Bush’s unwavering stubborness in policy, his site remained relatively unchanged for 6 years.  Between Sept 13, 2001 and March 6, 2007 the site layout was exactly the same.  Hmm.  So let me get this straight – between the time of Sept 11th and then when Democrats took back Congress in early 2007, the White House website layout stayed exactly the same.  Same website is to same layout is to same message is to same drumbeat. I don’t know there is a corralary there, but I find it interesting.

Day 2 on the job and already the announcement of the closure of Guantanamo within a year’s time, ending the CIA’s secret prisons, and changing how the military does interrogations.  Pretty righteous stuff and sure to make human rights, ACLU and lefties happier than they have been in 8 years.

Obama’s executive orders from yesterday have some religious and civil rights groups claiming this will ‘restore America’s moral authority’ again in the world.  Right fucking on.

But not so fast, O-gasmics!  Here comes the pushback…

First pushback from key, moderate Republicans:

From John McCain’s website:

“Numerous difficult issues remain,” Senator McCain and Senator Graham continued.  “Present at Guantanamo are a number of detainees who have been cleared for release but have found no foreign country willing to accept them.  Other detainees have been deemed too dangerous for release, but the sensitive nature of the evidence makes prosecution difficult.  The military’s proper role in processing detainees held on the battlefield at Bagram, Afghanistan, and other military prisons around the world must be defended, but that is left unresolved.  Also unresolved is the type of judicial process that would replace the military commissions. We believe the military commissions should have been allowed to continue their work.”

Then from NIMBYs who don’t want any of the 245 current Gitmo prisoners in their state:

From Politico:

“Cornyn, a Republican from Texas, told Politico that he’s written a letter to Obama “telling him, ‘Don’t move these dangerous terrorists to Texas – we don’t want them there.’”

(fyi: Rep. John Cornyn has a twitter account.  And his avatar looks like it’s from a J Crew catalog.)

Then the ‘leaked’ info meant to persuade/kill/promote policy issues:

Like this story of how one detainee went back to al-Qaeda after his release from Gitmo in Sept 2007.

Obama should have seen this coming and leads me to believe this may turn out to be Obama’s “Dont Ask/Don’t Tell” moment.

During the 1992 campaign, Bill Clinton ran on a campaign promise to overturn the military’s long standing policy of prohibiting gays from service.  Shortly after inauguration, Bill Clinton pushed for the repeal of the prohibition.  Then the backlash started.  Messages were run that said that lifting the ban would ultimately hurt unit cohesion and therefore hurt national security.  The compromise of Don’t Ask/Don’t Tell was then birthed.

The left wept.

Here we go again.  Great leftie ideal, not well thought out (or at least strategized) in terms of potential backlash.  We know executive orders don’t do much and are largely symbolic and most of the who, what, where, when, why and hows will be left to task forces.  But, if Obama doesn’t come up with a few more answers before the task forces get moving, the anti-Gitmo closures will gather steam and prevail in the court of public opinion.

Wow.  This must be what straight men feel like after the Super Bowl.  My head is reeling from the previous day’s activities, sites, news and such.  Hungover, feeling satisfied.  I don’t envy the evening news anchors today.  What to choose?  Sucks to be anyone else doing a press release today.  Everyone should just take the week off.  Let’s get right into a post game analysis of yesterday and an update on this morning’s already full day of news.

First.  AT & T sucks my asshole.  I hate them. Let me get this straight.  4 million people (or so) descend on a town and are likely to use their sexy new IPhones to send photos and text messages from the National Mall or from the inaugural balls.  Could they?  No.  AT & T users were frozen from sharing our best and favorite moments from yesterday’s events.  I hate you AT & T.  Now, I’m really mad at O for flip flopping and not voting to repeal telecom immunity last summer. 

I guess I forgive him, though. You know. Pretty good speech and all.

Let’s take a close look. I am not going to go line by line (my head is pounding today), but I will say this:  The speech was what I call “safe left with a side of daring left.”  It is a speech rooted in “the collective.” Some might call this socialism.  Those people are called Republicans and they don’t have a voice anymore (please note the RNC’s new webpage called “Center for Republican Renewal” if you think I am just being an arrogant sore winner).  But the speech language was more rooted in the “We the People” collective, not “let’s help that homeless person” collective.  Safe. 

There were pointed jabs at the Bush Administration and, in my interpretation, the McCain campaign and Republican campaign messages he defeated.  Specifically: “On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord. On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics.”  Oh snap!  Bush got served! 

Further along:  “We will restore science to its rightful place”.  Surely that’s a slam on this failed Bush ideology or countless others (hi intelligent design!).

Finally:  “As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals.” (Bye Bye Guantanamo! Hello Habeas Corpus!)

Now, attacking Bush and Republican dogma is pretty left just in its own right as I think other subtle jabs peppered throughout the speech (‘guided by these principles once more’ types of hints). But what specifically makes the speech left?  And what makes it safe left? 

Many references, again, are subtle, like collective ‘we’ language.  This speech was neither a reflection of nor an appeal to those who embrace the GOP’s vision of self-reliance.  Those times are dead.  It is mainstream now to be concerned about your neighbor’s foreclosed home and to favor diplomacy over use of force.

Obama also faked right, and went left with this line:  “The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works,” … that’s the head fake… and then… to the left: “whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage, care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified. Where the answer is yes, we intend to move forward.”   These are classic FDR leftist principles.  Safe, leftist principles that are used by both parties during the campaign, but are left nonetheless. 

Much in the same way we (or Obama yesterday) use rightish-language like “and for those who seek to advance their aims by inducing terror and slaughtering innocents, we say to you now that our spirit is stronger and cannot be broken; you cannot outlast us, and we will defeat you.”  These are mainstream principles each party can use to appeal to independent or swing voters.  Obama’s language throughout was mostly just that…mainstream leftist principles that appealed to the rabid left but may be a starting point for moving us further left down the road.

But let’s look at a few items of daring stuff.  “With old friends and former foes, we will work tirelessly to lessen the nuclear threat, and roll back the specter of a warming planet.”  In this sentence, Obama is equating the importance of reducing North Korea or Iran’s nuclear threat to the threat of global warming.  Environmentalists all climaxed at the same time methinks. 

But that wasn’t all to make environmentalists have a big o. “And to those nations like ours that enjoy relative plenty … can we consume the world’s resources without regard to effect. For the world has changed, and we must change with it.”   

One of my faves: “We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus – and non-believers.”  I think Bill O’Reilly’s head exploded.

 
First off – It IS just you, Sandeep.  Hype?  Are you mad?!  Do you club small animals for joy?  I am here in the bowels of the inauguration and I can tell you just about everyone has done at least one or two lines of O-caine.  We are in a major President-elect high right now.  The walls are melting and I can fly!  People are fucking smiling in DC.  Smiling!  And polite.  It’s very exciting to be here with all this enthusiasm and energy and, Goddess forgive me for saying it – hope.  If you want to feel hopeful, turn off CNN or MSNBC (still love you Anderson and Rachel!) and get on the next plane here.

Our crew walked around the National Mall today to get in a little site seeing since the day’s official activities were centered around the Day of Service.  We weren’t signed up for that.  The jumbotrons that lined the mall were re-playing the previous day’s “We are One” concert.  Honestly, it was pretty moving and our crew agreed that it was probably exactly what we would have seen the previous day had we made it on time.   Obama’s speech was pretty intense.  I got chills.  Teared up.  I am a total sucker for this stuff and probably just two millimeters short of ‘sycophant’ on the Obama fan ruler right now.    

And why are Democratic leaders continuing to be such a fucking buzzkill?  God.  You have 4 years to piss on the parade and disagree and hold turf and do all the pomp and circumstance you need to feel all muckity.  Can we swear Barack in first?  Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid recently was quoted as saying in response the recent stimulus package “I don’t work for Barack Obama.  I work with him.”  Jesus.  Yes, Harry.  Your penis is enormous.

There was a lot of other O-related news.  Jill Biden has a bigger mouth than her husband, which is somewhat comforting and somewhat alarming.  Guess she won’t be allowed to speak publicly anymore.  Karl Rove really is a megalomaniac.  Sasha and Malia have really bad taste in music.  And finally, Obama may reverse years of Bush’s international anti-choice policies on the 36^th anniversary of Roe v Wade.  On his second day on the job.  Fuck yeah. 

Today was a fantastic day.  I mean really fucking fantastic.  Why?  It’s called poetic justice.  Look it up.  As the President-elect is at the Lincoln Memorial with nearly 1 million adoring, tear-filled, Hollywood elite and everyday Joes, George Bush is at the Watergate apartment of Condy Rice having a low key, low press, low approval rating dinner with just a handful of staff.  Shakespeare have written a better ending. 

 And let me also just say this:  Good riddance Bushes.  I know it’s not exactly ‘new’ or ‘controversial’ to say that, but here is the 1,000,001th reason why I can’t wait to see them go: Apparently, they are AHEAD of schedule for moving their stuff out of the White House.  Charming.  Exactly how far ahead of schedule?  So much that they started in SUMMER and there won’t be a need for a moving truck in the lead up to the inauguration.  Nice.  Love that the moving out is the only thing done efficiently and ahead of schedule.  Nice fucking priorities, douche bag. 

Let’s turn that negative GWB energy into one sheet-grabbing-slash-pillow-biting-slash-back-arching O-gasm.  And there were nearly 1 million collective O-gasms today.  Today was the “We are One” concert and opening ceremony for the inauguration, featuring none other than President-elect himself and a few dozen of your favorite musical performers (and not-so-favorites, like Shakira).  They even trotted out that old workhouse Garth Brooks for a weird, sort of ‘say what’ musical moment.  Not that I got to see much of any of this in person, mind you.  Let’s put it this way:  there are 9 of us in my crew.  That’s 9 sleep schedules, 9 showers and 9 prep times to coordinate.  As a result, we arrived at the concert right at the tail end.  It didn’t matter.  There were swarms of people and that electricity was palpable.  The crowds were so large that observers were climbing up into trees to see the concert’s jumbotrons better.  Afterwards, folks started to pour out of the barricaded National Mall to head to the nearest Metro station and they were all in this postcoital-like dream state.  I might have been overly tired, but I swear I saw a unicorn prance across the Smithsonian with a rainbow shooting out its ass.  I don’t think it was Speaker Pelosi.  She’s not feeling very O-magical these days.

 All the predictions of nightmarish traffic and wall-to-wall people are starting to come true.  After the concert, the Metros were jammed, lines ran up the escalators out of the subway tunnel and around corners.  Waits for restaurant seating were like 2 hours.  This is a scary prelude to what we might expect during the actual inauguration (in 48 hours!), where the turnout is expected to be triple that of the concert today. 

I first have to say:  this town is fucking freezing.  I know Seattleites are the biggest Weather Pansies on the planet, but I’m from a Great Lakes state. Originally. Turn up the thermostat a few degrees, DC.  Motherfuck. 


Secondly, I would never look a gift horse in the mouth and I am extremely grateful I was able to get my tickets without incident;  but  I must add that the whole ‘procuring inaugural ball tickets’ was weird as hell.

I needed 9 tickets, but I was required to purchase 4 of the tickets from an official Obama fundraiser with my credit card at $1,000 a ticket. This apparently guaranteed these four tickets would get me into my preference among the nine balls. My preference: The “Western Region Ball.”  For one, Washington is my home state. Two, with California in the mix, I am banking that we’ll see some Hollywood. (I later get confirmation via the O-texts that Marc Anthony will be headlining the Western Region ball. I O-barf a little). Then I’m instructed to buy the other 5 tickets I need online at $150 a ticket. And there was no guarantee that the two sets of tickets were for the same ball. Luckily, I know people so these wheels were greased in my favor, but does this really make for the “Most Open And Accessible Inauguration in History”?  Debatable. 

 To actually get the tickets, I had to go to the Washington Convention Center at an appointed time—my time is between 9am and Noon—three days in advance of the Tuesday night ball.

 Washington state fun fact:  Guess which state legislator is the ‘date’ for Washington state’s junior senator?  Answer:  State Rep. Eric Pettigrew.  Maria’s cool points go up by about 100.